Friendship

This is why Tom and I are friends:

im going to go clubbing with my teacher who ahtes me becasue i dont care about learning chinese

adios

----its 9 o clock in the morning tom

----you need to prioritize

im getting sick

but i cant stop

ps

---dont fuck any natives

dialogues are where its at

---yeah?

and i will get my dick sucked by whom ever i please thank you very much

tombride10 has gone offline.

Happy Birthday, Marshall!

So work is gay. 

I started working at the Concordia Club and after the initial shock of extreme opulence wore off I detected the distinct feeling of old age and decay. The employees are all remarkably young and sexy (for the most part. Some waitresses have chests best described as 'excessively ample'). The average age of club members is 76 when th

ey bring their grandkids. The food is pretty good while the desserts are unbelievable. Concordia subscribes to the same rule of thumb as I do: When it comes to dessert, more Oreos equals more smiles. There was this OD cake. Three layers, quadruple chocolate and frilly as shit. It said 

in excessively frilly handwriting "Happy 93rd Birthday Marshall!" It looked so good and went mostly uneaten. I spoke with some of the 

waitstaff who informed me that the members where dying off at a steadily increasing rate. The only time the club is anywhere near full capacity is "weddings, bar-mitzvahs and brisks". The highlight: meeting the Falkowitzs, the self described "Only Jews at Governor Thornburg's inaugural ball". A distinction of which they a

re both proud and deeply shamed. 

Today, I hit the deck around noon. Earlier maybe. Did some pervy stuff and looked fo

r plane tickets for Spencer. Though he's not definitely coming, I got us the same gig we had last year and have been planning some activities most schoolgirlishly. We have been talking a lot more recently and that has been enjoyable. I think a l0t of people have written us off, but I have a lot of hope for us still. A couple weeks ago he gave me Middlesex and I am about halfway through. I like it and mourn the loss of old-Detroit.We should have just fucking stayed in Boston.

Later, my mom challenged me to a cookoff. I made pizza-toast and she made some kind of potato concoction. She won. I hung out with Marco and his mom and talked city politics for a while. Weird, fun. 

Alexander Crist and me went to the Greek Food Festival at St. Nick's in Oakland. So delicious. It was nice to see people of every color and creed nomming on gyros on a warm spring night. On this trip, I discovered three new Indian restaurants. Also, I introduced Alexander to the Fruitloop. He was appalled and it was crowded.

Came home. Found this picture and laughed and laughed

Argh!

Today marked my triumphant return to the Penn Hills YMCA. Everyone there is old and no one works out. I haven't been running in two weeks. I am a gross piece of shit. I ran three miles before I got distracted by an old woman who asked if I would help her grandson, present and aged approx. 11, "develop such a becoming physique". We fucked when I finished blushing.

I came home and jacked off a bunch before calling up Nick. He said he'd pick me up in 20...more like 45. While I waited, I watched some MTV. What a colossal waste of time. I decided that teenagers are awful. Nick came. His car is pretty gay and randomly has Florida license plates. We decided to get pizza in the South Side. We made fun of hipsters and talked about why I should transfer to Pitt. I saw a bus that reminded me of Spencer.

Speaking of which, plans are being set to have him come visit. Last time he made 200 bucks being a helpful civil servant "designing websites" for my aunt.

Jim called. We went to the Pirates game only to be shamed by Milwaukee and rained on for a while. Rick was there too. I would love baseball if it weren't so boring. Jim gave me the lowdown on what to expect from work tomorrow. Oh, I start work tomorrow. The three of us left early like true pIRATE fans. We got sandwiches and went to the Fruitloop. Rough night for cruising, btw. 

I came home, jacked off again and talked to Brendan. He's driving from SF to Boston in a couple weeks and plans to make a pit stop in Pittsburgh. He just got a $10,000 grant for grad school. How cool is that?  I want that.

Now, I smell bad and I'm in bed. I'm nervous and excited about work. I need to make mad money before September...by "mad money", I mean half of 950 times nine ($3,825) plus a little extra for food etc. 

Let's do it!

Home again

Yesterday, I left Boston and headed south, west. I traveled through much of Massachusetts, slept through Connecticut and a chunk of New York and awoke in the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania. I passed some of the Keystone state's most famous cities (Scranton) and landmarks (Pennsylvania Anthracite Museum).  Eventually, after 9 and a half hours of driving, we reached the glamorous East End of Pittsburgh.  I hugged my father, sized up my brother and ate four packets of Sunkist fruit snacks. I then noticed all the minor changes made by my folks since I had last been home. A new dryer, a new car, a new basketball hoop* and a new coffee table.  Such luxury! We, my dad and my mom and I, ate a delicious dinner and made jokes about everything. 

After I sent a few text messages to Marco, I put on a clean tshirt (for the first time in 2 weeks!) and made my way to Braddoc

k. In the Elk's Lodge, there was a little shindig for Patrick Dowd's campaign. He's running for mayor against Luke Ravenstahl, a typical Pittsburgh douchebag. I'm sure he's earned my vote. After shmoozing with some folk I noticed John Fetterman hulked over in the corner. Starstruck, I went to introduce myself. He was happy to discuss his appearance on Colbert Report, his tattoos and Braddock's shittiness with me, a creepy little kid. He bought me a beer! After drinking with this behemoth of a mayor, I then drove to Greenfield and carted Ricky all over creation. We told the same stories and made the same jokes we have made since 2003 but on the whole, my soul sang. Ricky is going to Put-in-Bay to work for the summer with a bunch of Central/Oakland friends. He lied to my face when asked why he didn't invite me.  

I slept until 6:15, took a shower then watched some the 20th running of the Pittsburgh Marathon...Kenyans! Also, I drove my mom's new maroon Scion. I am the gayest person on Earth.